WHAT A DAY YESTERDAY WAS

Michael Jackson was back in the news for alleged molestation charges; the state of Massachusetts' highest court ruled against banning same-sex marriages; 14-year-old American soccer prodigy Freddy Adu signed a four-year contract with Major League Soccer; Arnold Schwarzenegger took command of his first full day as governor of California; the defending Super Bowl champion Tampa Bay Bucs shelved three-time Pro Bowl receiver Keyshawn Johnson for the rest of season; AND... Mickey Mouse celebrated his 75th birthday.

Mickey was found escorting Freddy Adu around at Michael Jackson's ranch by the police who arrived with a search warrant signed by Arnold who announced on his first day of office that he was going to promote a bill against groping and "naughty" touching and as a first move was going to look into the allegations against Michael Jackson who was said to be in Massachusetts attending a marriage of two friends that was being officiated by Keyshawn Johnson formerly of the Tampa Bay Bucs. -- From Cindra (in the 'comments' section for this post)

Now I thought you were going to really announce some big news like Mickey was found escorting Freddy Adu around at Michael Jackson's ranch by the police who arrived with a search warrant signed by Arnold who announced on his first day of office that he was going to promote a bill against groping and "naughty" touching and as a first move was going to look into the allegations against Michael Jackson who was said to be in Massachusetts attending a marriage of two friends that was being officiated by Keyshawn Johnson formerly of the Tampa Bay Bucs. Aside from the fact that that was an atrocious sentence, I think it makes for more interesting news.

Mikal! You are so talented. Maybe you should just take Bill Maher's place in the pantheon of obersvers of Americana - and get the money he gets for doing it!!!