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December 31, 2005

HOLIDAY UPDATE -- FROM THE AIRPORT

So, it's 3:15 P.M. on New Year's Eve day and I'm blogging from a very snowy airport terminal in Hartford, Connecticut. The GF and I are on our way back to Indy after spending four days with my family, and five with hers. All-in-all, it was a most excellent vacation. I got to see my Mother and Brother and big and little cousins, while the GF got to see her family, which includes many sisters and a ton of cute and personable little nieces and nephews (including a new one she had yet to hold).

Right now, we're both feeling like we need a vacation from our vacation, which we'll get tomorrow--Sunday--and Monday, when she has the day off from work. Over the next few days and weeks I hope to post about:

- Recap of the last year;
- Goals for the upcoming year and beyond;
- Reflections on seeing my Mom and my Brother;
- Thoughts related to a recent visit to my Father's grave;
- A review of Len Lewis' new book, "The Trader Joe's Adventure" and
- Commentary on just about everything else, including stuff I know nothing about.

Till then... here's wishing everyone a Happy and Safe New Year's Eve, as well as a Safe and Prosperous 2006.

Update to the Update: 7:45 P.M.

Blogging now from a cozy rocking chair in the expansive main terminal/shopping mall that is Charlotte International Airport... smooth sailing thus far. Hartford's snow is Charlotte's warmth. We're one hour into a three-hour layover. Large white rocking chairs dot the main terminal, as do people sporting tans and shorts. As much as I like snow, I'm consistently being reminded of the fact that 2006's May is just five months away!

Posted by Mikal at 3:15 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

December 30, 2005

FOUR FOR FRIDAY - THE MORE OR LESS EDITION

Q1 - Time: Comparing the last 365 days to the previous 365, do you have more, less, or about same amount of free time on your hands? If more or less, what changed over the last year?

Q2 - Money: Do you think having more money would buy you more, less, or the same amount of happiness as you have in your life today? If more or less money, how much more or less would it take?

Q3 - Dating & Kissing: Thinking back to when you were in junior and senior high school, do you ever wish you would have kissed/dated more, less, or about the same number of people that you did back in the day?

Q4 - Exercise: Do you plan to exercise more, less, or about the same amount in 2006 as you did in 2005?

Posted by Mikal at 7:36 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

December 25, 2005

Continuing the trend of large-scale mergers, acquisitions, and strategic alliances, it was announced today at a press conference that Christmas and Chanukah (also known throughout the world as ëHanukahí or ëHanukkahí) will merge. An industry source (his name is Shlomo OíConnor) tells the Beli-Blog that the deal has been in the works for about 1,300 years, ever since the rise of the Muslim Empire. While details were not available at press time, it is believed that the over-head cost of having twelve days of Christmas and eight days of Chanukah was becoming prohibitive for both sides. By combining forces, the world will be able to enjoy consistently high-quality service during the Fifteen Days of CHANUMASS, as the new holiday is being called.

Massive layoffs are expected, with lords-a-leaping and maids-a-milking being the hardest hit.

As part of the conditions of the agreement, the letters of the popular Chanukah toy "dreidel," currently in Hebrew, will be replaced by Latin, thus becoming unintelligible to an even wider audience. Also, instead of translating to "A Great Miracle Happened Here," the message on the dreidel will be the more generic, "Miraculous Shit Just Happens."

In exchange, it is believed that the worldís ëchosen peopleí will be allowed to use Santa Claus and his vast merchandising resources for buying and delivering gifts (an e-commerce component to the deal, supported on the backend by Amazon.com, is still in the works). In fact, one of the sticking points holding up the agreement for at least 300 years was the question of whether Jewish children could leave milk and cookies for Santa, even after having eaten potentially Avian Flu disease-laden chicken for dinner. A breakthrough came earlier this year when Oreoís were finally declared to be Kosher.

All sides appeared happy about this. Shlomo OíConnor, the newly appointed spokesman for CHANUMASS, Inc., declined to say whether a takeover of Kwanzaa might be in the works as well. He merely pointed out that, were it not for the independent existence of Kwanzaa, the merger between Christmas and Chanukah might indeed have been seen as unfair cornering of the holiday market. Fortunately for all concerned, he said, Kwanzaa will help maintain the competitive balance.

He then closed the press conference by leading all present in a rousing rendition of, "Oy Vey Maria."

- - - - - - - - -
DISCLAIMER: This article is satirical. Any use of real names of people, alive or otherwise, is purely accidental and coincidental. Christmas and Chanukah are not merging. The staff of The Beli-Blog would like to extend seasons greetings to all, and to all a good night (or whichever greeting is most appropriate given your time zone and geographic location). Copyright Š 1999 or earlier - depending on who you ask - by Unknown or perhaps Nathanson, and adapted to work here.

December 23, 2005

Q1 -- Work: Would you be willing to go on strike for better wages, benefits, and/or working conditions?

Q2 -- Celebrity: If you were reborn the child of a celebrity, who would you choose to be your celebrity parent(s)?

Q3 -- Books: When you first start to read one, do you skip over the Foreword and/or Introduction, or do you read the book from cover to cover, Foreword and Introduction included?

Q4 -- Schools: Earlier this week, a federal judge in Pennsylvania struck down efforts to teach what's called "intelligent design" in one of the state's public school districts. Considered a major blow to those who seek new ways to bring religion into public schools, intelligent design says, fundamentally, that some systems of nature are so complex, they must be the result of a higher power. In Kitzmiller v. Dover Area School District, Federal District Judge John Jones, a Bush appointee, ruled that while the fact that a scientific theory cannot yet render an explanation on every point, it should not be used as a pretext to thrust an untestable alternative hypothesis grounded in religion into the science classroom or to misrepresent well-established scientific propositions. How do you feel about intelligent design being taught in public schools... should it be allowed, or do you feel the Pennsylvania ruling should be applied to all public schools in the U.S. and elsewhere?

December 22, 2005

Did you happen to catch last night's season ending episode of The Apprentice: Martha Stewart? Like I said a few days ago (click here for that posting), I'm a big fan, but that's not because I fall all over myself over the contradiction that is Martha Stewart.

At the end of a show that featured unabashed and inauthentic pitches and plugs for various Stewart-related products, Stewart says to the final contestants, each of whom is vying for a $250,000.00 job at publicly held Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia:

Solid choice. If you watched the show like we did, you may hold the same view, that Dawna was, all along, the best choice for the job. But what the heck was that nonsense Martha spewed at the end about Bethenny being a show-off and the type of person who feels she has to make a physical impression in order to get ahead? At no time before last night's season finale--not once in 13 or so episodes--did Stewart or anyone else for that matter associated with the show, ever make THAT statement or observation about Bethenny (who, by the way, I was not a big fan of myself).

What Martha should have said, but clearly chose not to because she's nothing more than a self-serving bully, is something like this...

But no, the contradiction that is Martha Stewart chose to use the show to throw a sucker punch at Bethenny, a contestant who genuinely looked up to her before last night's season finale, and who never once made an inappropriate physical impression on any of her fellow contestants or Stewart or her staff. Martha Stewart should be ashamed of herself, as should Omnimedia's Board of Directors and shareholders.

December 21, 2005

Here's this week's edition of 'Either Or And Why' (with the "Why' part always being optional). If you'd like more information on how 'Either Or And Why' started, or how it's intended to work, please click here.

If you would like to post this week's 'Either Or And Why' on your web site or blog, simply copy and paste the following code into your site's content management system, and please consider referencing this site as the original source:

<ol><li> Sugar or Splenda?
<li> Paper Clips or Staples?
<li> Fish or Birds?
<li> Window Shades or Window Blinds?
<li> Online Bill Pay or Mail Them a Check?
<li> Mountain Bike, Road Bike/Cruiser?
<li> New Year's Resolutions or April Fools Pranks?
<li> Rocking Chair or Couch?
<li> Subway or Wendy's?
<li> Packing or Unpacking?
</ol>

December 20, 2005

If a friend calls to tell you he's moving, you'd think--wouldn't you--that the next few words out of his mouth would be something like, "So, you know anyone with a truck?" or "What are you doing this Saturday?"

Even though I'd have gladly lugged boxes and furniture, all my friend needs is for me to help find someone to take a piano off his hands. Tuned just this year, if you're willing to move it, this little beauty is yours. At 58" wide, 38" tall, and 28" deep, no one will confuse her for a Baby Grand (or you for someone who actually knows how to play one), but it is a great starter piano for adults and tikes alike, and as you can see, it's top is a convenient place for books, candles, vases, and picture frames.

Here's how this works... if you're interested in bringing this piano into your home (for FREE), all you have to agree to do is make arrangements to move it yourself, ideally before the 23rd of December (that's this Friday). If you want it but cannot take possession until after this Friday, it may be possible for alternative arrangements to be made (in other words, my friend may be willing to extend the deadline under special circumstances, so if you really want it, don't let the deadline stop from you from inquiring).

If you'd like to claim the piano, simply leave a message in the "Comments" area below, and be sure to leave your e-mail address in the "Email Address" field. Oh, sorry for not mentioning this earlier... the piano's current home is out on the west side of Indianapolis, about five to six miles from downtown Indy.

SOLD (err... given away) to the lucky lady from (well, I don't know if she wants people to know where she lives or not, so I'll leave that part out). Anyway, if you happen upon this post post 3:00 p.m. on 12/20/05, too late... the piano's been spoken for.

December 19, 2005

Do you know what religion you are? Are you absolutely sure? According to an online test I took (only 20 questions, but they were 20 darned good ones)), Iím a Liberal Quaker (who knew!).

The top score on the list below represents the faith that Belief-O-Matic, in its less than infinite wisdom, thinks most closely matches my beliefs. However, according to the site, even a score of 100 percent does not mean that my views are all shared by the faiths listed, or vice versa.

Belief-O-Matic then lists another 26 faiths in the order of how much they have in common with my professed beliefs. The higher a faith appears on this list, the more closely it aligns with my thinking, or at least thatís what the Belief-O-Matic says.

1. Liberal Quakers (100%)
2. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (99%)
3. Unitarian Universalism (99%)
4. Neo-Pagan (79%)
5. Secular Humanism (79%)
6. New Age (74%)
7. Theravada Buddhism (68%)
8. Bah?'Ă Faith (65%)
9. Mahayana Buddhism (65%)
10. Reform Judaism (64%)
11. Taoism (57%)
12. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (56%)
13. Orthodox Quaker (56%)
14. Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (54%)
15. Nontheist (53%)
16. New Thought (53%)
17. Scientology (48%)
18. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (48%)
19. Jainism (42%)
20. Jehovah's Witness (40%)
21. Orthodox Judaism (39%)
22. Sikhism (35%)
23. Islam (34%)
24. Seventh Day Adventist (34%)
25. Hinduism (29%)
26. Eastern Orthodox (21%)
27. Roman Catholic (21%)

Belief-O-Matic makes the practice of choosing a faith into an experience that resembles filling out a questionnaire for an online dating service. Answer 20 questions on this web site and the site spits back out a list of religions or faiths best suited to your answers. Even if youíre absolutely 100 percent convinced of your religion or faith, you need to give it a whirl. It asks questions like, "What are the origins of the physical universe and life on earth?" and, "Why is there terrible wrongdoing in the world?" The multiple-choice quiz offers between three and eight answers to choose from.

So, what religion ARE you, and what does Belief-O-Matic have to say about it? Click here to find out!

December 16, 2005

Q1 - Saturday Night Live: Last Saturday, Alec Baldwin guest hosted Saturday Night Live for the 12th time. Who, out of anyone either dead or alive, would you like to see host an upcoming episode of SNL?

Q2 - Air Travel: Do you keep track of your frequent-flier miles? If so, approximately how many do you have, and, have you ever used frequent-flier miles to obtain a ticket? If so, where did you fly?

Q4 - Reading: What's the last book you read, and, what book are you planning on reading next?

December 15, 2005

In yesterday's online edition of the Indianapolis Star, Indiana House of Representatives' Speaker of the House--Brian Bosma--is quoted as saying that he will fight ěby all legal meansî necessary a recent U.S. Federal District Judge's ruling that the prayers opening the daily sessions at the Indiana House of Representatives must be nondenominational and may not advance any one religion in particular. In Bosma's own words...

As the Star previously reported, in his late-November ruling, Judge David Hamilton did NOT ban the offering prayers in the Indiana House of Representatives. Rather, what Hamilton ruled, based on a 1983 U.S. Supreme Court decision setting very specific boundaries on legislative prayer, was that anyone chosen to give an invocation inside of the House of Representative must be instructed in advance not to do so with language that invokes any one faith.

In other words, no more "In the name of [insert deity here] we pray." Seems fair enough to me (as it does, I mght add, to every other reasonable person I've spoken to about this issue).

Despite this fact, Bosma tells the Indianapolis Star that the Indiana Attorney Generalís office--at his insistence--will file procedural motions asking Judge Hamilton to reconsider his order and temporarily suspend enforcement of the order while his appeals are in play. In addition, Bosma tells the Star, state attorneys will give notice that the State of Indiana intends to file an appeal with the Seventh Circuit Court of Appeals in Chicago.

Okay, so if I understand this correctly, taxpayer dollars are going to be applied towards a lawsuit aimed at allowing people to invoke Jesus, Allah, Brahma, Shiva, and Moses when prayers are given during daily sessions of the state's House of Representatives? Come on, is this Bosma guy for real? Is this the type of work his constituents elected him to do... spending taxpayer dollars on retributive justice, especially at a time when the state's coffers are predicted to come up around $75 million short in tax revenues over the next year-and-a-half? Give us all a break, would ya, Bosma!

As someone said to me recently, no one is attempting to take away anyone's right to practice his or her religion. That's nothing but a red herring of an argument because it distorts what the real issue is here. When the Indiana House of Representatives sanctions a prayer of any kind, it IS an implicit sanction of that particular religion verses another. One should not be forced to walk out of a legislative chamber, ever, when in the room expressly to do one's job, which is, after all, to legislate, not pray.

If it is so important for people to pray before the beginning of a state legislative session, I suggest they do so in private. No one is trying to stop any member of the House from having a connection with his or her spiritual and/or religious leader. Pray in the car on the way in; pray silently while walking into the room where, after all, the work of state government is supposed to be of primary focus. And for Jesus-Allah-Brahma-Shiva-and-Moses' sake, please stop spending valuable resources, i.e., tax dollars and an under-staffed Attorney Generalís office, to push the point any further. The State of Indiana has bigger fish to fry (no pun intended).

December 13, 2005

Any Martha Stewart fans out there? My GF likes the domestic diva enough to watch her nationally-syndicated daily how-to home-oriented talk show each day after work, and the two of us have been faithful followers of her weekly prime-time reality show, "The Apprentice: Martha Stewart."

While it was announced yesterday that Stewart's daytime show, simply titled MARTHA (produced by Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia and reality TV guru Mark Burnett, and distributed by NBC Universal Domestic Television Distribution to over 98 percent of the country) was renewed for the 2006-2007 television season, it's the icon's own comments in a recent interview with BusinessWeek Magazine's Editor-in-Chief Stephen J. Adler that I think is more newsworthy and absurd. From last Thursday's interview:

Okay, so who wants to take the first shot, err... I mean, in light of her comments, who wants to share their views? Mine are in the "Comments" area accessible by the "Comments" link below!

December 11, 2005

From my friend and Chicago-based blogger-extraordinaire, Luke over at the very insightful Decisive Moments... commenting on those who ridicule his choice of mode of transportation:

As many people who read this blog know, I didn't get my driver's license until I was 36-and-a-half-years-old. Numerous bikes and public transportation were my chosen modes of transportation, and even in Boulder, Colorado--the bastion of bicycling and bicycle commuters--I still ran into people who didn't 'get it.'

Apparently, I didnít 'get it' either... my first car, purchased after my Internet company sold in the winter of 2002, was a brand-spanking-new Land Rover Discovery II SE (pictured here), which went by the wayside this past January in favor of a more economical and environmentally-friendly Honda Civic.

My next car... a Marin... the very same Indiana Fire Trail model that hangs from a wall in my apartment. Get ready naysayers because the day WILL come... as Luke wrote:

December 10, 2005

Like my friend and former co-worker Scott explains here, I too do a lousy job of allowing myself to be sick. Take this past week for example:

Tuesday: I woke up feeling like crap. Despite a runny nose and pain when I swallowed, I went about my day just like any other... went to the gym and an appointment on the north side of town, then spent the rest of the day on the phone and in front of the computer (thank you "daytime non-drowsy, stuffy head, sore throat, coughing, aching, fever, relief to help get me back my energy" cold medicine). I even took the GF shopping for a new hand-mixer once her workday had ended (Target and K-Mart are very welcoming places for sick people, especially around the holidays).

Wednesday: Same thing, only my ears started to itch like a mother-bugger, and I'm pretty sure I was running a low-grade fever. After spending the morning in front of the computer, I went to a colleague's house where we worked on a project we're in the planning stages of, and then came home and did more work in front of the computer before watching Martha Stewart's version of The Apprentice. Sleep was made possible only with the aid of the "nighttime, sniffling, sneezing, coughing, aching, fever, sleep better to feel better" medicine.

Thursday: Still ill'in, but since I had an all-day meeting to run, I doubled the dosage of Dayquil, which kept the shivers away until around 3:00 p.m., after which I'm hoping no one noticed. Following a 45-minute drive home (details here), I spent time in front of the computer and on the phone before plopping down on the couch with the GF to watch Donald Trump's version of The Apprentice. La la land allowed me in, but again, that's only because I flashed Dayquil's older brother, Nyquil, at the door.

Friday: More of the same.... all hopped-up on Dayquil, I worked the computer and phone for most of the day, despite feeling like I was being run over by a giant cactus. When I finally stopped to make dinner (which the GF said would make me feel better), I was resigned to the fact that I was sick and in need of rest and relaxation.

Saturday: That's today, and since I feel wickedly dry and weak (thanks Dayquil, thanks Nyquil), I plan on doing nothing but sleeping, resting, and watching TV, just as soon as I finish checking my e-mail :-)

December 9, 2005

Q1 - Co-Workers: Do the people you work with tend to be younger than you, the same age as you, or older than you? How do the differences in age or generations play themselves out in your work environment? In other words, are these sorts of differences good, bad, or not a factor in the work you do?

Q2 - Television: Last week, Kevin Martin, the relatively new chairman of the Federal Communications Commission, said he was in favor of an "a la carte" cable pricing plan that would allow consumers to choose to pay only for the individual cable channels they want. Do you like the idea of a la carte pricing for cable TV? If Martin is successful in getting the cable industry to offer it, how many channels do you think you'd choose to subscribe to a la carte?

Q3 - Eating Out: After receiving the bill for a great meal in a restaurant you'd been dying to try, you notice that your waiter neglected to charge for one of the items you ordered and happily devoured. Would you... tell the waiter, not tell the waiter but leave a larger tip than called for, or not do anything? Would your answer be different if the meal or service really sucked?

Q4 - Business Cards: Do you have one? If so, how often do you hand yours out verses receiving them from others?

December 8, 2005

Indianapolis received its first big snow storm of the year today. Here's how it looked at 4:45 p.m. this afternoon (this picture taken from the driver's seat of my car, looking towards the front of the State Capital, west on Market St. from north bound Illinois Street):

While snow is almost always a welcomed sight, a 45 minute drive just to go nine (9) blocks was not, especially in a timid little Honda Civic that was about to get run over by a big Hummer (not really, but f you saw the size of this Hummer--especially in comparison to the cars surrounding it--you too might have thought the same thing).

December 7, 2005

Here's this week's edition of 'Either Or And Why' (with the "Why' part always being optional). If you'd like more information on how 'Either Or And Why' started or how it's intended to work, please click here.

If you would like to post this week's 'Either Or And Why' on your blog, simply copy and paste the following code into your web site's content management system, and please consider referencing this site as the original source:

<ol><li> Books or Magazines?
<li> Disneyland or Disney World?
<li> Laptop Computer or Desktop Computer?
<li> Chronicles of Narnia or King Kong?
<li> Skateboards or Rollerblades?
<li> Robert De Niro or Al Pacino?
<li> House Plants or Gardening?
<li> Pen or Pencil?
<li> Road Trip or Cruise Ship?
<li> I Love Lucy or I Dream of Jeannie?
</ol>

December 6, 2005

What the Star and everyone else should be asking isn't whether Manning is more deserving of the SI award, but why Brady won the award in the first place. Thus far in 2005, including his team's three Super Bowl-related playoff game wins in January and February, Tom Brady has guided his team to a total of 10 wins, a feat hardly worthy of SI's award (especially when one considers that a handful of other NFL quarterbacks have accomplished the exact same thing over the same period of time).

In bestowing its 2005 Sportsman of the Year Award on Brady, what Sports Illustrated is really doing is recognizing Brady's accomplishments over the course of the 2001, 2003, and 2004 NFL seasons when Brady guided the New England Patriots to the 2002, 2004, and 2005 versions of the Super Bowl, a game that is played in February of the year following the designated NFL year.

The problem with "Of the Year" awards such as these is that many of them are handed out before the year ends and before one has a legitimate opportunity to analyze and evaluate one's performance for the entire year in question. And the problem is not just with sports awards:

And the list goes on and on, all the while, 2005 hasn't even ended, yet alone 2006. "Of the Year" awards should be based on merit, not projection. Tom Brady should have won Sports Illustratedís Sportsman of the Year award last year, shortly after guiding his football team to its last Super Bowl victory. The 2006 line of Honda Civic automobiles should only be eligible to win Motor Trend magazine's 2006 Car of the Year award once the 2006 calendar year has ended and the magazine's staff has had a chance to review the line of cars based on performance.

In a related note, Sportsbook.com, a leading online gambling service, was forced to halt wagering on SI's Sportsperson of the Year award due to suspicious betting activity. According to news reports, since odds were posted on the annual designation several weeks ago, numerous wagers from the same source--a New York-based PR agency that just so happens to represent SI's owner, Time Warner--for the maximum allowable bet were placed on Brady. Then, on Friday evening, December 2nd, a leak emerged that Brady would, in fact, be this year's winner.

December 5, 2005

Saturday night, while watching a television commercial with the GF, I started to comment and complain about the inauthentic nature of a sales pitch blaring at us from the box on top of the TV stand. (Nothing ever seems to rub me the wrong way like a television commercial portraying the appearance of one thing in order to sell another.)

At some point during the tirade I uttered, "This [complaining] is the type of thing Larry David would do (LDWD)!"

Less than 24 hours from the time those words left my lips, my old college buddy Dave left the following comment on my post from last Thursday (the one where I pointed out a discriminatory attitude over at a local pizza shop):

If you haven't caught HBO's hit series Curb Your Enthusiasm, my friend Dave's comment, as well as mine own "LDWD" reference, wouldn't mean much. For the uninitiated, Larry David is one of the co-creators of the TV's Seinfeld, and his HBO show--Curb Your Enthusiasm--which just wrapped up its 5th season, cuts so deeply into the twisted lines of decency, ethics, self-delusion, and morality that it's nearly as painful to watch at times as it is laugh-out loud hilarious.

Part Kramer, part George Costanza's alter ego, Larry David plays a quasi-fictional character based on himself... someone who consistently finds himself in awkward predicaments and misadventures, but as only he can seem to do (and get away with), stubbornly clings to his own brand of 'Davidish' principleń-like the time he thanked a friend for an expensive dinner at a Santa Barbara restaurant for himself and his wife but deliberately chose not to thank his friendís wife; or the time he picked up a prostitute just so he'd have someone to occupy the passenger's seat in his car in order to legally drive in the less crowded HOV lane on the way to a baseball game at Dodger Stadium.

Curb Your Enthusiasm is so pervasive and drop-dead accurate about many of life's unaddressed awkward situations that its become an instant cult classic. Next time you find yourself in a shallow, miserable, selfish, duplicitous, egotistical, or neurotic situation, feel free to ask, What Would Larry David Do?

December 4, 2005

IndyScribe is sponsoring a digital photo holiday contest, where you send in your best photo of a holiday display, Christmas lights, nativity scene, yard display, etc. Visit the contest page for rules and how to submit your photos.

December 3, 2005

Earlier today I participated in the 2005 Jingle Bell Run -- an annual 5k / 3.1 mile road race that starts and ends at the Michael A. Carroll Track & Soccer Stadium on the Indiana University-Purdue University at Indianapolis (IUPUI) campus. The main staging area for the race was the adjacent National Institute for Fitness and Sport (NIFS)--a mammoth 120,000+ square-foot multi-sport exercise facility that up until last night's news broadcast on our local CBS television affiliate WISH TV, had a squeaky-clean image here in Indianapolis. But I digress... first, let's get to the race:

Last year, I somehow managed to finish this same race in 34 minutes and 51 seconds, which placed me 610th out of 734 runners. This year, according to results posted just as I was leaving, my time was recorded as 35 minutes and 53.5 seconds, which means I was a full minute and 2.5 seconds slower than last year. Not exactly what I was hoping for, but then again, as with last year's race, I managed to run the entire distance of this year's Jingle without once stopping, which in and of itself, so far as I'm concerned, is accomplishment enough on a cold morning like today.

I'm sure I'm not going to be the only blogger here in Indianapolis to cover this one (it's just too full of 'juice' for it not be the 'butt' of other bloggers jokes), but in case you haven't caught wind of it yet, last night's evening news broadcast on local Indianapolis CBS affiliate WISH TV revealed that since last April, undercover Indianapolis police officers have been making arrests over at NIFS for "indecent behavior and sexual activity in the men's locker room."

Today, when I went to NIFS to pick up the timing chip that allows me to know how fast I covered the 5k route, conversation after conversation about the arrests could be heard throughout the fitness center lobby. And to only make matters worse, right on the counter at the main check-in desk was a large sign that read:

While the idea for the article, as well as the method for locating people who can be interviewed for the story, make sense, I nearly fell to the floor with internal laughter and amusement when I saw the sign's bolded title ("Get Your Name in the Indianapolis Star"... how ironic).

Anyway, irony aside, I had a great time participating in this year's Jingle Bell Run. I saw a couple of old friends--Beth and Becky--and it was good to see that both are thriving and doing what they love, and the line to get post-race water and bananas was a lot more efficient than last years when runners waited upwards of fifteen minutes just to rehydrate after the race.

As for NIFS, I hope it doesn't become too damaged by what I'm sure will be an onslaught of negative publicity by local press and bloggers alike. For the record, I used to be a dues-paying member at NIFS, but dropped my membership back in early-2003 (in favor of a using gym closer to work). Never once did I see examples of the non-fitness-related activity that's now being reported by WISH TV, but I suppose that doesn't mean it wasn't happening. In any event, I wish NIFS well, and I also encourage their staff to reconsider the title of that sign!

December 2, 2005

Q1 - Kids and School: A local car dealership in Yuma, Arizona, has announced it will hold a raffle at the end of the school year awarding brand new cars to two high school students who achieved perfect school attendance records for the year. How do you feel about incentives and awards for perfect school attendance?

Q2 - Religion and Government: Earlier this week, a federal district court judge ruled that the prayers opening the daily sessions of the Indiana House of Representatives must be nondenominational and may not advance any one religion in particular. In the court-issued opinion, U.S. District Judge David Hamilton wrote that the "official prayers" offered at the Indiana House ěconsistently advance the beliefs that define the Christian religion", and that moving forward, prayers in Jesusí name--or anyone else's name for that matter--would no longer be allowed. How do you feel about Judge Hamilton's ruling? Should prayers invoking Jesus, Moses, Allah, etc. be allowed during the opening of the daily sessions at the Indiana House of Representatives, or do you feel the judge's ruling was appropriate?

Q3 - Christmas Decorations: According to the National Christmas Tree Association--yes, there really is such an organization--in 2004, Americans purchased 27,100,000 real Christmas trees (with an average price of $42.60) and another 9,000,000 fake trees (with an average price of $96.50) for a total of 36.1 million trees valued at $2,000,190,000.00. Do you plan on purchasing a Christmas tree this year? If so, will you be buying a real tree or a fake one?

December 1, 2005

It amazes me how some people choose to run their businesses. Whether it's a company that fails to list its telephone number anywhere on its web site, or customer service phone lines which make us more frustrated then when we originally placed a call in the first place, some businesses just don't seem to understand or even care about providing good service to their existing and potential customers. For example:

1. My bank has intentionally moved away from supplying deposit slips in the lobby, at least at the branch I like(d) to frequent. According to the bank manager, since customers like to take more than one deposit slip at time, she felt it was necessary to pull all of the deposit slips from the lobby, opting instead to hand them out on a case-by-case basis. In the meantime, when the line to see a teller becomes long enough to stretch to the door (which is 75 percent of the time because, of course, the bank's understaffed), a bank manager comes out from behind her desk to hand out deposit slips to customers who need them. No pens, mind you, just a deposit slip. (You see where this is going?) By the time you get to the person who shouted "Next In Line" at you from behind bulletproof glass, you're nowhere near to being prepared for the ensuing transaction (because, as you can guess, it's kinda hard to fill in a deposit slip when you don't have a pen or hard surface to write on). This only infuriates the teller, who already has to scream because of the bulletproof glass that separates the two of you and the cop standing behind you in the lobby, where they no longer keep a supply of deposit slips for fear of you taking more than one at a time. Can you say 'direct deposit'!

2. The new pizza joint in my neighborhood refuses--despite customerís frequent requests--to sell pizza by the slice. The reason? Well, at first I thought maybe they just didn't see the value proposition in selling pizza by the slice. After all, they're new to the restaurant business, so maybe they just hadn't figured out how to price slices so they'd come out even or ahead of the price of a full pie. If not that, then I figured they must have a prep issue... you know, the pizza oven isn't calibrated to handle one slice at a time, or something like that. Both perfectly reasonable but easily solvable obstacles. Well, as it turns out, neither price nor preparation is the issue. (Ready for this?) The only reason they've chosen not to sell pizza by the slice is because they do not want certain types of people walking in off the street and frequenting their restaurant. And just who are these certain types of people? Well, while the owner of the pizza shop wouldn't come right out and say it, she referred to "those people" from up the street, "the ones who are always walking up and down this part of Pennsylvania Ave." Translation: if you live in my neighborhood, you know darned well that she's referring to the folks who make their home in the Lucille Raines Residence--a facility owned and operated by the Indiana Area United Methodist Women. Many of the men and women living in the five-story Raines Residence are actively engaged in rebuilding their lives from substance abuse. Some are parolees, while others are visually impaired. The common thread though running through all of them is that they eagerly share in learning to function as independent citizens. Many of them also happen to be single African-American men, but I digress. Bottom line... if the pizza shop starts offering slices, which again, people are asking for, the owners feel they'll be overrun with the wrong type of customer, who just so happens to be black. Never mind that this wrong type of customer's money is just as good as anyone else's, and never mind that serving the wrong type of customer when he or she is down but on their way back up may actually endear them to the restaurant for years to come. Aww, heck... while we're at it, never mind the discriminatory and exclusionary nature of the practice. My suggestions of a policy that slices are available for to-go orders only was met with, "Yeah, but they'd still have to come inside the restaurant."